2009..

so every year..i say how i have these new plans and resolutions..yadi yada..but never seem to stick to it because they just dont work out..this year im actually going to try..good plan..
so here are a few of the resolutions..
1)save money! half my pay check in my savings, and the other half the bills i have(some spending obviously)
2)care more about school. try to succeed.
3)make better choices..some of you know what i mean!
4)work on some friendships that need help..
5)try to get along with my family.
6) find out what i want to do with my life!
7) be more optimistic.

here i come '09

its been a while..

i dont know what exactly inspired me to write a blog..i just felt the need to for some odd reason..work had been pretty busy lately..but im glad i got the past three days off! it was good to just chill..i have this feeling right now that i need to try to over achieve everything at school which wont happen..i dont know why i feel that way..i do though..i have work in less than 30 minutes..i dont want to go..but i have to..its kind of my job..im still tired even tho i am always sleeping in! lately i have been laying in bed at night til way late not being able to go to sleep..and sleeping in til 12..its not healthy but i cant really do anything else..i had to wake up early because of work which i honestly thought i would over sleep. but i woke up surprisingly..gah my car is in the shop so i have to use my parents..i have to go the speedlimit! not just because its my parents car but because of tickets..i dont want one..another one...haha. i think im going to santa cruz today? idk. depends if i feel up to it..we'll see how i feel after work.

highlight

of my day..was soccer..while playing that leapfrog game..haha, alexis, falling on top of people as she was going over everyone..i didnt think she was actually going to fall. but she did. it made me happy..haha. and then i liked one of my corner kicks alot..it was perfect..i think my coach was surprised..her voice when saying it was good, kinda was a surprised tone..

anyways..today was good..i read more of twilight. but my ipod died by third period =[ i forgot to charge it..aye aye aye..i have to get 3 page long journals done and an essay for the same class done by tomorrow..except im working on a project thats not due til friday or monday..im pretty stupid..i know.

tthingssss

so i guess things can turn around. everything has been looking up lately...i hope it stays like this!
im so happy our group got a 103% on the test! i thought we bombed it..but teh worst grade was like a B+...but still getting one of the highest scores..well the highest...that was surprising. =]
soccer was really goood today! i liked playing link ups there..that was funny.."your cheating!!!!" she cracks me up..haha. then we played the head chest thigh catch game..tied with katee..i think she shouldve won the last part..but i cheated..i think..haha..i shouldnt have pushed her haha. its okay..we both get a present tomorrow. haha. im excited..kinda..then chrysta was all, "what if its a nobhill giftcard" and i was like, then id cry..id walk in there saying, my coach gave me a giftcard to my own work..awesome, right?!? it was funny..
and work wasnt bad at all! it was sooo chill.! i like my talks with betsy! she always makes work worth going to..haha..i apologize over nothing and its hilarious. my manger made me hot chocolate and gave me a jacket =]]
i need to write my journals..which im getting done..kinda..not really..i need to tho! thats why im waking up soooo early..
tomorrow is going to go well...i can tell!

when..

when someone asks, "if someone you cared about walked out of your life, would you let them go? or chase after them?" it gives me a sick feeling. its like..what if i do chase after that person, but they keep running away..do you keep chasing, or just give up?
i just want to give up sometimes..it gets tiring after a week or two..i felt like the bad person at first, but now, im feeling like someone who is stupid because i am still chasing after someone i wont ever be the same with..idk..it seems silly...it is..im trying not to let this bother me..its hard..someone i was once honest with about every little thing, has now become one of the people i talk to the least..idk what to do..to let them go or have hope?

anyways..school tomorrow...gnite